TJ (oomazzo) wrote in guan_yu,

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OK, this is messed up. My grandma comes into MTM today. I see her and give her a hug. I've talked to her off and on for the past 8 or so years (long story). She told me we need to talk. OK, I'm thinking she gonna rag on me for not coming over and stuff. She says, "Tom, I'm dying" I'm like stunned. What am I supposed to say. She proceeds to tel me about 3 aneurysms in or on her brain. Now I dunno much about them, but I do know that if 1 blows YOUR DEAD. So again I'm like stunned. So we started talking about current things (my cousin has a BF, they been steady for 4 or so months now.) and remanising on past times, shit like that. But then she makes me promise her something. She made me promise her that my mom (her daughter) and my step-dad wouldn't be at her surgery and if she passes on, they can't be at the furneral..... WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! How can you hate someone that much that you say that??? Especially your own daughter??? And she puts me in the middle of this. I have to be the message boy... I'm ready to cry at work. I was so pissed at her. I t took everything I had in me not to yell at her. I got really close to crying. How the fuck could she do that. How can you hate someone that much???? It makes no sense to me. All she told me was,"I've took so much shit from her. I turned 1 cheek and the other cheek. I have no more cheeks".

Ok, why??? My mom and my grandma wasn't always on good terms. They fought often. But thats what kids do, fight with their parents. It's fun. but I don't understand why they would hate each other like that. Their last blowout was over my stepdad. My mom hid him at first. My grandparents are really old fashion. Whites stay with whites, blacks stay with blacks, and so on (Yea, I guess I woulda got disowned with my last GF too HEE HEE) My stepdad is Black/African American. So what??? Does it matter that much??? People are people. An asshole is an asshole. A good person is a good person. Does skin color or race mater??? I think not. My last girlfriend is black, she was a good person.

But now I'm faced with the task of being the middle man. I gotta tell my fam the news. How do I tell them that then say,"Mom, grandma said you can't go"???? So fucking lost right now...
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anurisums yes one blows its possible it can kill you instantly
its not the only likely corse of action tho you can actuly live with them

ok next thing
you should not have to do a dam thing man
like you said its draging you in the middle you should't be placed in the middle of this at all
honstly and calmly try to explain toyour grandma hey you don't want her there then you tell her

altho she may not do this and hell you dont' even have to do it
she never ever should have asked something of you
its afight between the two of them
not you man

now i know its hell of alot easyer for me to type it then to do it
honstly you dont' have to do anything
now... you could go tell your mom this
you shouldn't have to
but how would that go?
maybe trying to get your grandma to reconsile but then agian your in the middle if you do that

i am sorry to say i don't see any easy way out
unless they don't talk so much that (and this will sound mean sorry) your mom wouldn't know about the oppration
hang in man
How would that go???.... Let's just say I feel safer in a cage full of pitbulls in a meat suit. My grandma will not talk to my mom. That will never happen. I wanna get them to forgive eachother but how do I do that with my grandma being a walking bomb??? She told me that at anytime, 1 of them could blow. Hell, the damn surgery is only a 50-50 chance she'll make it out OK. Them if she does their is only a slim chance of no perminate damage. ???? Humph, what to do???
i have been thinking bout this and thinking about this trying to put my self in that place
seeing as there is alot of infighting in my own family it wasn't too hard
however i have always kept my self out of it
i have no ideas
out side of omitting the truth and just not saying anything
cuase your right you can't have them confront each other

the only real option you have been left with then
is to find some way to gently (sorry thats laughable) let your ma down

unless you have other family members that might be willing to go with you to talk to your mom about it.. or even help you try to patch things up? i am so sorry man you should't ahve to go threw this
Thankz.. I'm gonna tell them tuesday. After I find out when the surgery is.
man i ll be thinkin bout you
and if i can figure anything out by then i tell you
i am really sorry
Shit happens, what can you do???